Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Why Can Shove It

Heard something interesting on the radio today. Shockingly, the people who brought us 6 Ways to Tell Your Girl to Lose Some Weight don't think women can be bosses! I'm actually not angry or even offended by this article because really it's laughable and devoid of any fact whatsoever.

Here are their reasons:

Women can’t control their emotions
All women have Queen Bee syndrome
Business was built by men, for men
Women hold grudges

I have never personally worked in management or been anyone's boss, but I have worked for both male and female bosses and really have no preference. Each manager has their strengths and weaknesses, and amazingly, it's different for each individual. might be surprised to learn that not all women are the same!

In regards to emotions, I will concede that generally speaking women are more emotional than men, but I think that most women in management can put their "emotions" in check and do their job. Except of course during that time of the month when their period tears are devastating everyone around them.

Work isn't like gym class for christ's sake. We don't get "personal days" every month when our "special friend" comes to town. Amazingly, women in management and non-management remain in the workforce without "going crazy" once a month. Of course, women owned businesses do shut down once a month... Give me a break.

Next, someone apparently thinks they're cool because they watched Mean Girls. And we know that all women are really just "mean girls" deep down! Uh, I mean "Queen Bees."

Like that bully from grade school, the Queen Bee has a similar overcompensation problem. If women in positions of power felt they were qualified and competent, would they really need to be such raging bitches? We think not.

That's right ladies, put your management dreams aside. Everyone knows you are a narcissistic raging bitch. My eyes hurt from rolling them so far back into my head.

I think my favorite is "Business was built by men, for men." That's right, it was. And our government was founded by white men and pretty much for white men at that time. So, according to's logic all females and minorities in government should turn in their key cards. That means you, Obama. Great, now we are left with Joe Biden as President, happy now??

Here's some words of wisdom for all us female aspiring managers:

Deals are still done with a handshake over cocktails in a dark lounge -- not really what you’d call feminine. In order for women to compete with any level of competence, they have to adopt masculine qualities. Take a look at the pants suit; seriously, what the hell is that? No one likes the pants suit. You know who wears a pants suit? Hillary Clinton

Hmm, that's interesting because in my organization the top two sales reps are both female. I guess they are masculine because apparently successful and competent = masculine. "Cocktails in a dark lounge" See, the world of business deals has evolved, unlike the asinine author of this article. Note: Women have been wearing pants for a long time. Like, a really long time.

I also really like the jab at Hillary Clinton. As if that's the worst possible person a woman could be. OH NO, NOT HILLARY! No, why encourage women have a successful career and you know, run for President. Women should be posing scantily clad for, not working to stop human trafficking.

And finally, we come to "women hold grudges." Uh, I've talked men in the business world who have gotten screwed over by male bosses that had personal grudges against them. That's just stupid. Women don't hold grudges any more than men do. I don't even have a funny quip for this one. It's literally too stupid to insult.

So there you go, can shove it.

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